Knitting Trolls



My poor pup...and other things...

Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Trolls!!

Oh how I have missed blogging with you. Yes it is only due to my laziness, but since I have been gone oh how our blog has flourished so. B-$ Troll is blogging and we have comments from other people outside the KC metro area. Wonderful!

Oh, my poor pup Gizmo. What has he gotten himself into now you ask? Well, not a fabulous knitted hat like Ernie our troll mascot. Just take a look for yourself....

This dog gets into more drama. He somehow got a foxtail stuck in his right paw and was hopping around all sad like...then he chewed an actual hole (will spare you the pic) through his paw to get to said foxtail. A week later he was having surgery and was fitted with this sad but stylish blue cone and a mini cast. It was pretty hilarious watching him try and drink water or eat with the cone...and he got stuck in his carrier....this guy is hours of entertainment. But you gotta love the Shih-Poo.

In knitting news....I am STILL making my placemats. They will rock when I FINISH them!

Since you other trolls have many spawning friends, somebody needs to make this pattern. This is perfect for you B-$ Troll, you wanted to make something for a baby and a poncho- so voila!

Melanie Troll

PS Melted ice cream rules and is making a comeback...mark my words.

Rock on...

Melanie designed an album cover for my old imaginary band - Melted Ice Cream.


Does that rock or what?!

Rock on, knitting trolls, rock on...

Michelle (formerly lead singer/guitarist of the best imaginary band ever)

The 4 Skins

This has to be my favorite band name ever! It's no melted ice cream but I found it very entertaining. My drunken friends Stan and Skin found this band in the scary but kooky basement of Blaney's. We saw them countless times. We even went to their final show. Good times.

Okay, calling all trolls! I need simple knitting patterns. I need the baby blanket one and maybe a hat...do babies wear many hats? I don't know. Dogs don't, that's all I know. My friend is knocked up (I love that phrase) and her child needs warm things since it's due date is in February. I would also like to make a shrug and maybe another poncho.

Okay, so that's my boring blog for this morning. Now, I guess I will go do some conflict resolution with battered women whose children keep peeing on the bathroom floor. Apparently this is not cool in a community living situation. Who knew? So, send those patterns.

Yours in Transitory Sobriety,
B-$ Troll

Our Nation's Birthday


Sooooo...what are we fun loving trolls doing for our nation's birthday? Besides of course pondering the definition and legalistic issues of sodomy (which I am proud to say is no longer illegal in some of the 50 states!) I get sooo bored with the usual 4th antics. Does this sound familiar? Going to someone's lame picnic with people who think more than one wine cooler is a "wild time", while eating lukewarm, unimaginative potato salad and wondering if I'll have the runs since mayonnaise should not sit that long, while sweating my ass off in the sun and almost being burned to death by someone's child (insert husband also)and their fireworks. Or better yet, sitting in traffic for 2 hours to and fro to watch the "corporate woods display." No thank you! I think I may sound a little bitter. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention the 3,000 children running around unsupervised and shooting you with waterguns (last year's party!)

Okay, so I'm done with my ranting. Back to knitting - CUTE patterns! I have downloaded and printed them. I also love the baby lash poncho but I can't see Trish outfitting a child in a poncho. She wouldn't be caught dead in one. Luckily, I found a pattern for a doggie poncho and will be getting started as soon as I finish mine.



Don't you just love the "realistic" doggie? Okay, that's all for now. Thanks for letting me vent. I will now go try to squeeze as much money as possible out of a group of rich housewives. Wish me luck!

B-$ Troll

Lazy days...

Sunday, June 25, 2006
Amazing how time flies when you're feeling lazy... I can't believe it's Sunday already! I spent most of the rainy Saturday yesterday reading King Dork by Frank Portman. It's a young adult novel that the critics were raving about but I just thought it was OK. I guess I'm getting old... The best thing about the book is that the young man narrating and his best friend are always creating new band names, designing band logos and naming their first album. It's hilarious. When I was in high school me and my best friend had a fake band named Melted Icecream. Unlike the book, we never went on to form a real band - this band existed on paper only. I was the lead guitarist and singer while Julie played bass. I think my first boyfriend - Jeff Richards - was the drummer (what is my thing with dating drummers?!). Once word got around about Melted Icecream, everyone wanted to be in the band. And I mean everyone! We had a keyboardist (this was the late '80's after all), a tamborine player, roadies, bus driver, etc. I wish I could find that paper that listed all of the band members. Aaah, nostalgia...

So, I have actually gotten some knitting done in these past 2 weeks since posting - below please find the latest baby blanket (I thought it was my last for awhile but another friend had to go and get knocked up) and another baby hat.

The blanket was based loosely (and I do mean loosely) off a pattern from Family Circle's Easy Knitting magazine. It was knit with Hobby Lobby Yarn Bee yarn (isn't this yarn so cute?) on size 10 needles. It was probably the easiest blanket that I did. The hat is another one from the Art Yarn Candy yarn knit on size 6 needles from a pattern off the label. I love these little hats...


This scarf is based loosely off the Stitch and Bitch book's Coney Island Fireworks scarf. I did use the Trendsetter eyelash yarn that it called for but I used a cheap black acrylic yarn that I had for the black yarn. The damn eyelash yarn kept getting tangled up so I had to throw some of it away so the scarf is not as long as I'd like. Also I knit it on size 10 needles as the size 15 called for in the book just did not look right. For just being a garter stitch scarf, this one was a real pain the ass!

OK, stupid blogger has now decided to stop posting pics so I can't post the pic yet of the hat made out of the self-striping yarn. Sigh... So anyhoo, that's what I've been up to. I know, my life is exciting...

Damned NSA...

Wednesday, June 07, 2006
Dear Melanie -
So last night I actually got off my lazy butt and took pictures of my latest knitting projects and worked on updating the blog. I had a very cute (so I thought) posting that kept with the whole theme of 6/6/06 (you know - E (with a capital E)-vil, etc.)but when I went to post it the whole thing disappeared. Was it the anti-Christ rearing it's ugly head? Hmmm, perhaps... If by Anti-Christ you mean the NSA (National Security Administration for those of you not in the know). See, I had put some derogatory remarks about President Bush (I know, hard to believe) in my posting. Coinky dink? I think not...

But enough of my conspiracy theories... On to knitting! If you want to see pure E-vil, check out the look on Ernie's face in this pic!

Yeah, he's not happy to be my model. This pic was taken after about 10 tries of getting him to keep the hat on his head. He finally just gave in and was thoroughly disgusted by the whole procedure. I thought it was funny (perhaps I am E-vil).
Here's a pic of the baby hat without a dour faced kitty.

How cute is that leftover ball of yarn?! This hat was knit from a yarn called Candy and the pattern was printed on the label. It was knit flat on size 6 needles. You could totally knit this hat. So cute!

I also knit finished baby blanket number 2 (only 1 more to go unless somebody else gets knocked up!).


Here's the pattern for that blanket. It was knit on size 8 and size 11 circulars and the yarn was Bernat Baby Soft. See the heart pattern? See the mistakes I made in the heart pattern when I didn't count right? Sigh...

OK, I'd better get off of here before there is more tracking of my online activities.

Your "going on the down low" blogging partner,
Michelle